A Goodbye Letter

Dear Fountain Soda,

I'm sorry that it has to end this way, but it's time to go our separate ways.

It's not that I don't love you. In fact, quite the opposite. That's what makes this goodbye so heartbreaking. It's just....well, you're just not good for me anymore.

I'll always cherish the times we had together. Trust me, I will never forget how you got me through those three rough pregnancies, when there wasn't a solid food on the planet that I could keep down. I could always count on you. The Whopper Jr craving came and went, the boiled hot dogs were but a passing fancy. But you, fountain soda, were the one thing I could rely on to give me at least some mild satisfaction in an otherwise miserable existence.

I remember the time my father-in-law thought he could replace you with a plain old canned soda, that I wouldn't know the difference if he poured it in a cup with ice. Oh, how he misunderstood our connection to one another.

I remember when I cut you out a few years ago; the intense caffeine withdrawal headaches that seemed to gnaw at my conscience....how could this be the right thing to do when it feels so wrong? I don't remember exactly when I fell off that wagon, but you welcomed me back with open arms. McDonald's even started to sell giant ones of you for a dollar, making our rekindled relationship that much sweeter.

But alas, fountain soda, it is time for our affair to end. I have to admit, it's mostly because of the new fitness app I've downloaded to the iPod. I just cannot stomach telling MyFitnessPal about you. Watching my calorie deficit shrink to nothing just because I've let you infiltrate my life again -- it's just too painful to endure.

So that's why we haven't seen each other since last week. Yes, it's a bittersweet farewell. But I know in my heart it is the right thing to do.

I hope you can find someone else, and forget about me. It's really the best thing for all of us.

Fondly,

DD