Third time's a charm

I have to admit, I love being a third-time mom.

I never would have thought it, but each time around has been an entirely different experience.  It's not like just going through the same old thing over again.  I guess I thought that each subsequent edition of motherhood would be essentially a repeat of the first time, just with a little more experience.  But truthfully, its like a whole different ball game.  Or, maybe more like a different inning in the same ball game.  The point is, anything can happen.  What happened earlier doesn't mean a thing.  But, you've learned a little bit, and you're not quite so intimidated.

Kid #1 was an amazing experience.  Everything was new, everything exciting. Learning everything - from what made my kid tick, what stimulated him, how to discipline him, how to love him - all of it was exciting, fulfilling, and truly amazing.  

What struck me about Kid #2 (affectionately referred to as Noah) was how nothing was the same. It wasn't just about expounding upon what I'd learned the first time.  There were a few lessons that translated, but truthfully, I couldn't just rely on what worked the first time around. I had to pay special attention to who this kid was. That may seem like common sense, especially if you haven't gone through it yourself -- I certainly thought so during the "pre" second child phase.  Obviously I knew this kid would be his own person.  But the extent to which it became an entirely different parenting experience was a surprise to me.

So, now comes Kid #3.  And you might think that this time, since I've already had one repeat experience, that I'd be prepared for this one.  But its even more different this time.  I learned my lesson from the first time around.  I knew that parenting this one would be its own unique experience. This time, its not that unique approach that threw me.  It was the ease with which I figured out how this new one would fit into our lifestyle.  And how "un"stressful it was to get her assimilated.  How she became an automatic necessity in our lives.  It seems a little weird as I write it now, but truthfully, it was a big shock to me. 

I once read, I think in one of my Parents magazines, that when you ask any particular family the question as to when is the 'right' timing to have children, almost ANY family will tell you that the way they did is the best way.  I love that.  And you know what?  The way we did it is the best way.